Thailand Golf Blog

Warm-Up Routines No Good For Your Golf Game?

There was a collective sigh of relief last week from members of my favourite Golf Society in Thailand, the Mainly Unquenchables Golf Society (the MUGS). One long-time member, Alistair - a Desperate Dan look-alike with a dry sense of humour and what he describes as a ‘power fade’ (i.e. a huge slice) – brought along to the MUGS “clubhouse”, the Limping Cockroach pub, a DVD which he had somehow acquired. This apparently demonstrates that common warm-up routines may be robbing us of our strength and energy before we even approach the first tee. In the DVD, "Par and Beyond Secrets to Better Golf," Dr. Jerry V. Teplitz explains the “Meridian Acupuncture” lines in the human body and how these energy fields affect your golf game. It seems that when we take practice swings, we are interfering with and reducing the flow of energy in our body and our ability to drive the ball farther. To prevent this, Dr.Teplitz advises, simply take your practice swings and then rub your stomach along the “Spleen Meridian” line to restore the energy in your body. To order your copy or find out more about the DVD, visit www.golf-help.info. This all came as great news to most MUGS members, many of whom can be seen red-faced, wheezing and gasping as they approach the first tee, having tried in vain to follow the latest warm-up advice, but failing even to touch their knees, let alone their toes (which most have not seen in years). Alistair’s plan was to explain to his caddie about the “Spleen Meridian” line so that she would know exactly where to rub. All this was of little interest to one MUGS member, 4-handicapper, ginger-haired, John, whose pre-game routine is to lay waste to a large bowl of spicy noodle soup, washed down with a big bottle of Singha beer. Invariably, he then strolls to the first tee and dissects the fairway with his opening drive.

It was John who caused another rules argument on the last MUGS outing to Lakewood Golf & Country Club in Bangkok. He had hit a great shot on the par three fifth hole on the Rock course to within a foot of the pin. One of the other players in his four-ball, loss-adjuster Robert, was short of the green, chipped on, and knocked John’s ball into the hole. John claimed that he had the right to either replace his ball where it had been, or to leave it where it finished, i.e. in the hole. So he claimed a birdie two. The MUGS organiser, Charlie (a.k.a. the “Ayatollah Hogmanay”) was called upon to give a ruling. He decided that what John was claiming was an old rule and he had in fact scored four. Charlie explained this is now covered in Rule 18-5, Ball at Rest Moved by Another Ball. There is no penalty to either player as long as the following procedure is adhered to: The person whose shot struck the ball at rest plays his ball as it lies; the person whose ball was moved returns the ball to its original position. Failure to replace the ball that was moved to its original spot; as in John’s case, results in loss of hole in match play or a 2-stroke penalty in stroke play.

If you have had to seek a ruling on an unusual happening on the golf course, please post it, or email it to me and I will do the rest.

Play fast, swing slow.

Sex, Lies and Obsession

Could golfers be the most driven and obsessive of athletes? 

A survey from Lexus, in connection with the automaker's involvement with the U.S. Open Championship, reveals that golfers may be the most fanatic and persistent of sportsmen. Whether it means skipping out on family obligations or forgoing their next raise, there's almost nothing they won't do to achieve perfection. Here are the findings from the survey:

Ø      Four out of ten golfers (43%) would readily give up sex for a month in order to have the perfect golf swing!

Ø      And more than one in five -- 22% -- would give up their hair!.

Ø      Another 21% would be willing to sacrifice their next raise.

Ø      In their never-ending quest for perfection, a majority of golfers have told a white lie about where they were when they were actually playing golf (60%).

Ø      Two out of three golfers have skipped work in order to play golf (66%).

Ø      More than four out of ten have skipped church or religious services (43%), and a similar percentage have bailed out on a family gathering (41%).

Ø      In what may well lead to a record number of women signing up for golf lessons, 43% of women who golf say the sport has improved their relationship with their significant other.

Ø      Three out of ten golfers say if they had to choose, they'd rather have a perfect golf swing than a perfect marriage (30%).

Ø     Ø More than seven out of ten young golfers ages 18-29 admit they've called in sick and gone to the course rather than to work (73%).

Ø  Nearly one out of every two golfers (49%) says when buying a car they check to see how many bags of clubs can fit into the trunk.

Ø  More than one in five golfers (22%) say their golf skills beat their skills in bed or behind the wheel: they're better at golf than at sex or driving!

Play fast, swing slow.

Sex, Lies and English Gentlemen’s Clubs

Having established myself in my earlier postings as firmly sexist, the subject of today’s post, and the next is …………………sex! “What has sex to do with golf?” I hear you cry. Well, read on:

I have been golfing in the UK recently and the main topic of conversation in pubs and golf clubs up and down the British Isles just now is the news that plans for a Single Equality Act are being drawn up by the Government. The proposals will spell an end to the “sexist” practice of women being stopped from using certain dining rooms or bars, or only being allowed to play golf on a certain day – common practices in golf clubs in the UK . One golf club I know of has a white line painted along the middle of its bar marking where women can and cannot stand. When the proposed law changes appeared in the newspapers, it caused many blazered, striped-tied, gentlemen golf club denizens to choke over their gin and tonics. Here are two typical headlines: “No more ladies’ day at the golf club under sex laws shake-up”. “Ladies’ days at the golf club could be bunkered”.

At my own home club in Wales , ladies are classed as associates, not members, are only allowed to play on Saturdays after 4 pm, and there is a men only bar. The standard reaction to the planned law change from most members was that the club should go back to a male only enclave. Under the proposed overhaul of equality laws women will also get the legal right to breast-feed in public places, and there has been speculation as to whether this would interfere unduly with their golf swing. A couple of old chestnuts, probably apocryphal, have been doing the rounds. The first concerns Margaret Thatcher who, when Prime Minister, went in her official car to pick up her husband, Denis, who had been golfing at Royal St. George’s Golf Club in Kent. However, she was asked to wait outside as females were not allowed in the clubhouse. Then there was the occasion when Her Majesty The Queen was to be the official guest at a long-established golf club. As a special exception, she would be allowed to enter the front door, a privilege not normally allowed to females. One ancient stalwart was heard to remark: “I don’t think I will be in the Club that evening”.

That gentleman would no doubt be apoplectic at last week’s historic breakthrough when the British Women’s Open was held for the first time at the home of golf, St. Andrews, and the ladies were to be allowed to enter the R & A clubhouse, normally men-only. Although the men's Open has been held there 27 times, this is the first professional event for women ever to be held on the grand Old Course. For two centuries the home of golf has barred the fair sex from membership and the clubhouse. The fuddy duddies would no doubt be doubly appalled by the fact that among those teeing off in the tournament were at least two temptresses who feature in their own raunchy calendars. Sophie Sandolo, the one left, above in the basque, stockings and stilettos, is a 30-year-old described as 'French-born Italian' who lives among the millionaires of Monaco. She began playing golf at 14, turned professional in 1999 and finished 15th in the order of merit in 2005. She has career earnings of more than £500,000 and lists her interests as sport, shopping, dancing and cinema. Of her skimpy outfits she says: “My first sexy calendar is intended to represent my love for golf, my desire for freedom and a touch of coquetry.”

Natalie Gulbis, the one in the white bikini, is a blonde 24-year-old from Sacramento,  California. She turned professional when she was 18 won her first LPGA Tour title at the Evian Masters in July, and has career earnings of more than £1.25million.

Happily, here in Thailand , these matters are not an issue. Ladies are very welcome. Clubhouses have changing facilities for ladies, spas and beauty salons, and pleasant 19th hole refreshment areas, open to all.

One last politically incorrect footnote: Why is Michelle Wie, pictured left, the one more decorously clad, having trouble with her driving? Answer: Because she is a women, of course!

Play fast, swing slow

Thai Tigresses

My thanks to Mark for his comments on my earlier posting where I talked about the US Women’s Open Golf Championship and commented on the strong showing of Asian lady golfers, particularly the Koreans, the “Seoul Sisters” of golf. Mark asked: “And what about the Thai lady golfers? Maybe a separate post on their progress as this would be very interesting”. So here goes:

Whilst no lady Thai golfer has reached prominence yet on the LPGA Tour, there is a whole crop of very talented Thai youngsters coming through. Perhaps the most promising is 23-year old Onnarin “Moo” Sattayabanphot. (Moo means “little pig” in Thai!). At the age of 12, Onnarin (pronounced o-NARE-n) first picked up a club when she went to the driving range with her father.  She was so intrigued by how such an odd-shaped club could hit a ball so far off a tee, that she quickly became interested in taking the game up. While in high school at La Salle College in Bangkok, Onnarin captured 11 tournaments in four years, was a member of the Thai national team from 1999-2001, won silver medal as an individual and gold medal as a team member in both the 20^th and 21^st Southeast Asia Games, and was named 1999 Golfer of the Year by the Thailand Amateur Ladies Golf Association. Two years ago, Onnarin ventured from her home in Bangkok to the United States for the opportunity to play golf at a top university (Purdue) and get a quality education while doing so. Whilst at Purdue, she recorded 15 top-10 finishes in collegiate competition, including one win, was selected for the Big Ten All-Conference First Team selection (2004-2006), and the 2006 NGCA All-American Second Team selection. Last year, before turning Pro, Onnarin was named the 2006 Big Ten Player of the Year and Purdue Female Athlete of the Year. This year she has played eight events on the Duramed Futures Tour, achieving eight top ten finishes, the best being second, and earning US$16,052 to date, ranked 19^th. Onnarin missed the cut in the US Women’s Open on +10, but perhaps her happiest moment so far as a Pro was when she achieved a rare double-eagle or albatross on the par-five 11th hole of the Louisiana Pelican Classic last April.

Other Thais making their assault on the Futures Tour this season are Nontaya "Net" Srisawang from   Chiang Mai, Huachai from Bangkok, and Tiffany Tavee, actually born in Arizona of Thai parents. 20-year old Nontaya, currently ranked 43^rd with two top-ten finishes, knows how to win having come first in 2004 Teens on the Green World Championship, the 2004 Asia Pacific Junior Master Golf Championship, the 2004 Thailand Ladies Amateur Open, the 2005 Hong Kong Ladies Open, the 2005 Phuket Thailand Ladies Master Championship, the 2006 Orient Masters in WenZhou China and the 2007 LPGA Sectional Qualifying Tournament. I believe Nontaya gave a helping hand to Onnarin by caddying for her at the US Open.

In all there are 17 Thai lady professionals who are potentially capable of winning high-profile tournaments anywhere in the world, including rising players like Pornanong Phatlum, Porani Chutichai, Rungthiwa Pangjan, Tiranan Yoopan, Titiya Plucksataporn, Walailak Satarak and Banchalee Thienthong, as well as seasoned Pro, Rayong’s Russamee Gulyanamitta. 21-year old Porani, from Chiang Rai, has qualified to play in the Step Up Tour in Japan, while Tiranan and Rungthiwa are heading to Japan to play in the Q-School this year. I have deliberately not mentioned yet the popular 17-year old twin sisters, Aree and Naree Wongluekiet, now also living in the United States. Their mother is Thai but they have now opted for Korean citizenship (their father is Korean) and are announced on the first tee as “from Korea”, which seems a shame.

One final footnote that I came across whilst preparing the above and may amuse you. If you think Onnarin Sattayabanphot, or any of the other names in this post, are hard to pronounce, try saying the name of Hawaii's state fish that is engraved on the wedge carried by Shayna Miyajima of Maui, Hawaii. Believe it or not, ‘Humuhumunukunukuapuaa' fits on the back of the club. I am told that the fish's name is pronounced like hum-moo-hum-moo-nooku-nooku-ah-poo-ah-ah. And why does Miyajima have the name of a fish on her golf club? "My club fitter is in San Diego and he's trying to learn Hawaiian words (!) and I guess he just really liked that one," she said. Feminine logic at its best.

Play fast, swing slow.

Wet Week In The UK

My recent sporting experiences in the UK confirmed why I prefer to be in Thailand, especially for golf.

The week-end before last I went with some friends on a mini golfing break. We had booked a great deal at the Tewkesbury Park Hotel, Golf and Country Club, five minutes off the M5 motorway and about 75 miles from my home in the UK. Two rounds of golf, with buggies, one night’s accommodation, dinner and breakfast, all for £80 (about 160 US$, less than 5,000 baht). On arrival, we were told that the course was closed due to heavy rain. Eventually, we were allowed on to the soggy course (but, no buggies) and managed to get round in time for dinner.

The next morning, we completed 13 holes before the heavens opened again. From then on the rain never stopped and within a couple of days, Tewkesbury turned into a stranded island and more than 10,000 families were left homeless in the area, electricity supplies to 50,000 homes were cut and, ironically, 150,000 homes were left without water.

The following Friday up to Lord’s, the home of cricket, for the second test match between England and India. Having travelled to London in relentless, driving rain, on arrival the ground resembled a lake and it seemed that no play would be possible. Miraculously, the weather relented after lunch, and due to the fantastic new drainage system, we were able to enjoy a few hours’ cricket.

Last week-end, I was at Carnoustie in Angus, Scotland for the Open Golf Championship only to be greeted again by "dreech" Scottish weather: constant drizzle and a cold, stubborn mist. The players and spectators looked like Michelin men with layers of wet proof gear, some even wearing winter golf mitts. This, in the middle of July! Apparently, a foreign visitor asked why the tournament was not played in the summer!

The Open had not got off to the best of starts what with Gary Player’s outrageous, unfounded claims about alleged drug usage in the sport, and the farce which led to eight competitors playing 19 holes rather than 18 in the first round of the final qualifying round at Sunningdale. They had to play the fourth hole of the Old Course twice after, mid-round, the pin position was deemed unplayable and moved from one side of the green to the other! Might there be repercussions in the next outing of the MUGS? Half a dozen golfers arguing with Charlie to change an "unfair" pin position after they have played the hole?

Coincidentally with my comments in a previous post about Asian men failing to make an impression on the PGA Tour (unlike the ladies), all the talk before The Open was about whether K J Choi could be the first Asian player to win a major. In the event, Choi had his career first top-10 at a major and left Carnoustie convinced that he will one day hoist the Claret Jug. Asian Tour stalwart, Singaporean Lam Chih Bing failed to make the cut despite being spurred on by an entourage of twelve family members including his 79-year-old grandmother. She must have found Carnoustie more than chilly because I know I certainly did.

In the end, the exciting finish and Padraig Harrington’s first major win will be what is best remembered about the 2007 Open at Carnoustie. But my thoughts were more about heading back to Thailand for some hot golfing weather.

Play fast, swing slow.

GorgeoUS Golf

As per my previous post, last weekend I watched the Golf Night programme on satellite TV. Having followed the very exciting finish to the European PGA Tour Open de France, I was dissuaded from switching off and going to bed by the sight of some stunning lady golfers gracing the US Women’s Open Golf Championship.

Wow! What a change from the days when lady Pro golfers tended to look like retired hockey players! The event was more like a fashion show and many of the participants would not look out of place on the models’ catwalk.

As you probably saw, the winner was Cristie Kerr – at her 42^nd major attempt! The 29-year-old Kerr shot a final-round, 1-under-par 70 at the Pine Needles Lodge & Golf Club, Southern Pines, North Carolina, to register a two-stroke victory and finally claim that elusive major prize, just like Phil Mickelson did in the Masters in 2004.

What really caught my eye though was that, out of the top twenty five finishers, no fewer than sixteen are Asian, or of Asian extraction. Twenty four Koreans made the cut, only one less than the number of Americans.

Typical is runner-up, 18-year old Angela Park, a veritable United Nations wrapped into one small package, born in Brazil to South Korean parents before moving with her father to California at the age of eight. And at only 5ft 5 inches (about 1.62 metres) and looking like she weighs about 8 stone (112 lbs or 51 kilos), Park can really play golf. Look at her stats: Average Drive 245.3 yards, Fairways Hit 82%, Greens in Regulation 72%, Putts Per Hole 1.68.

Actually Cristie Kerr is listed as being the same height as Park although she looks much bigger (on my tv at any rate) having a more ‘American’ build. I read afterwards that she had shed three and a half stones (about 49 lbs or 22 kilos) over the past few years. Just as well because after sinking the winning putt, she leapt into her husband’s arms. Some years ago she would have flattened him.

NOT included in the sixteen Asians referred to above, is Michelle Wie. She followed up her shameful and controversial withdrawal from the Ginn Tribute (when she was in danger of shooting an 88 which, under an odd LPGA rule, would have meant that she would not be allowed to play in tournaments for the rest of the year) by also walking off the 10th hole of the second round of the Open after aggravating her wrist injury. Wie seems to have lost her way. She has yet to win anything of significance on the LPGA Tour and her attempts to compete with the men have been an unmitigated disaster. Compare her to Morgan Pressel (pictured above). Apart from returning to golf too soon from her injury, Wie seems to be distracted by all of her off-course commitments. I do hope that Alexis Thompson does not go the same way. At the age of twelve (yes, that’s twelve, just 148 months into her existence), Alexis became the youngest ever participant in the US Women’s Open. Someone that young, however good she may be, playing in Pro golf tournaments just does not seem right to me. She failed to make the cut on +16.

It appears that the strong Asian influence now on the LPGA Tour is not reflected in the men’s game. My guess is that, apart from V J Singh, the Asian men have not yet developed the power needed to succeed on the PGA Tour. Compare Angela Park’s average drive of 245 yards with the fact that the average drive of the longest driver on the US Tour is now touching 320 yards. As for me, on a good day, with a downhill running fairway and a typhoon-strength gale behind, I am right up there with Angela Park! I would be interested on your views about the Asian take-away of the LPGA Tour.

Play fast, swing slow.

French Connection

This last weekend on satellite TV I caught the Golf Night programme – mainly to ogle the divine Di Stewart. Featured were two events: the European PGA Tour Open de France ALSTOM played at Le Golf National near to Versailles outside of Paris; and the US Women’s Open Golf Championship.

The French Open was won by England’s Graeme Storm, a former Amateur Open winner who holed Britain and Ireland's winning putt in the 1999 Walker Cup match against America. Otherwise, he is best known for creating history in 2000 when his mother, Jane, caddied for him in the Masters. The 29-year old Storm lost his tour card in 2003 and spent the winter in a cream cake factory, cleaning baking trays to pay for his trips to the European Tour Qualifying School in Spain. I suppose he could not have chosen a more apt place than Versailles to capture his first Euro Tour event since it was there that Queen Marie Antoinette famously said of the French population, "Let them eat cake" - before she was guillotined. To continue the analogies, in the final round Storm did not lose his head and went home with a 666,660 Euro slice of the prize pie, thus guaranteeing himself a place in The Open at Carnoustie. The runners-up were left with only crumbs of comfort.

What I had not realised was the long history of the Open de France. It was inaugurated in 1906 and is the oldest national open in Continental Europe. Hard to imagine now, when you can fly from London to Bangkok in under twelve hours, but the top British pro’s in the early 1900’s used to consider the tournament as a ‘major’, travelling for a couple of days to reach the venue.

I was particularly fascinated by an item on the tv programme about Arnaud Massy, one of the great characters of golf in its early days. The son of a sheep farmer, Massy worked on a sardine boat and supplemented his income by caddying at the new Biarritz golf course where a great many of the best professional golfers from Britain came to practice during the off-season in the warm climate of southern France. Blessed with natural abilities, he learned from these pro golfers and in 1898 Sir Everard Hambro (a philanthropist from the Hambro banking dynasty, and no mean golfer himself) sponsored and took him to North Berwick, Scotland to develop his skills for a professional career. As a self-taught player, he had started off playing left-handed. In Scotland he then had to rebuild all his technique to play right-handed. In 1906, Arnaud Massy won the first edition of the French Open repeating the success the following year, defeating a strong contingent of British players including the great Harry Vardon. He followed up by becoming the first non-Brit to win The Open Championship (British Open) in 1907 at Hoylake. On being presented with the Claret Jug, he learnt that his wife had given birth to their baby girl christened Margot and they gave her the second name of Hoylake.  His victory raised the profile of the game in his native France, and with three other major players, Massy put on exhibition matches in various European cities that contributed significantly to the increased popularity of golf on the continent. In 1910, he won the inaugural Belgian Open and in 1911 was the runner-up at the British Open to Harry Vardon, conceding only on the 35^th play-off hole. That year, Massy completed his book on golfing that was successfully published in France then translated into English for the British market - certainly the only example of a French golf book translated into English! In 1912, he won the first Spanish Open ever played. Massy's golfing career had to be put on hold as a result of World War I. While serving in the French army he was wounded at Verdun but at war's end was able to return to golfing. At age 41, he had lost four prime years and struggled to compete. Remarkably, in 1925 at age 48, he won the French Open for the fourth time and then won back-to-back Spanish Opens in 1927/28. He participated in the first matches against the USA. When his career finally wound down he worked as a pro at courses in England, France and Morocco. Married to an English woman, he lived in Edinburgh, Scotland during the Second World War. Arnaud Massy remains the only French golfer ever to have won any of golf's four majors, and was also the only golfer from Continental Europe to win a major before Seve Ballesteros won The Open Championship in 1979. This swashbuckling character was France’s greatest golfer ever.

My take on the US Women’s Open follows in the next posting. Play fast, swing slow.

Play It As It Lies

Members of my favourite Golf Society in Thailand, the Mainly Unquenchables Golf Society (the MUGS) returned to Bangkok this week from their regular mini golf tour to Cha Am / Hua Hin. There they played the Dragon Hills, Royal Hua Hin and Springfield Village courses. Apparently, the trip gave rise to more than the usual number of disagreements about golf rules interpretation. The MUGS organiser, Charlie (a.k.a. the “Ayatollah Hogmanay”) was called upon a number of times to issue his edict. The MUGS “clubhouse”, the Limping Cockroach pub is still echoing with opposing views.

Billy, he of the flailing golf swing that can only be compared to a manic food mixer, was first to tee off on the tour. He skulled his ball, never to be seen again, off the heel into thick grass about twelve yards to the left of the tee to resounding cheers from the other fifteen members, and their caddies, gathered around. He opted to play three off the tee, but the onlooking crowd were roughly evenly divided as to whether or not he was allowed to tee the ball up again. Charlie’s decision: yes.

Then, Mike, a huge man and a former senior manager for a multinational company in Thailand, whose weight in stone is only just less than his handicap (24) and Dave, who all around eighteen holes and, indeed, throughout the post-golf evening, keeps up a non-stop commentary (which is probably what caused the problem), got into a mess on the 12^th hole. They were sharing a golf cart and, it was only when they took their putters out that they realised that, inadvertently, they had been playing the hole using each other’s clubs! The general consensus was that they each should be penalised two shots for each shot that they took with the wrong club. Charlie’s decision: one two shot penalty each only.

On Springfield, John,  a retired security expert with a bad back who, as he finds it difficult to bend down, takes a second caddie to tee up the ball, had an air shot on the 2^nd fairway. It was only as he addressed the ball again that he realised that it was his playing partner’s ball. As it was the wrong ball, John claimed that he should not be penalised! Charlie’s decision: one shot penalty.

A seemingly innocent mango grove caused a furore on Royal Hua Hin. Stephen, a lecturer in law at Bangkok’s Chulalongkorn University, and as fastidious and meticulous on the golf course as off, hit a long iron into the mango trees. To the incredulity of his playing partners, he immediately claimed free relief as going into the grove would constitute a “Dangerous Situation” under the Rules of Golf. Apparently, according to Stephen, mango is in the same family as poison ivy and the mango fruit skin contains urushiol, which can cause dermatitis. The last time he had picked a mango on the golf course, having subsequently answered nature’s call, he developed a rash in a rather…er, sensitive area, if you know what I mean. Hey, when you’ve got to go, you’ve got to go. Gives a whole new meaning to ‘scratch golfer’ doesn’t it. As it happened, Charlie was playing in the same four ball and, much to Stephen’s disgust, ruled that his ball should be played ‘as it lies’ or, declared ‘unplayable’.

Back at the Limping Cockroach, Charlie was able to back up his decision by referring to the USGA Decisions on the Rules of Golf: Decision 1-4/11 - Meaning of “Dangerous Situation”.

“Q. According to Decision 1-4/10, a ball lying near a live rattlesnake or bees’ nest is a “dangerous situation” and relief should be granted in equity. If a player’s ball comes to rest in or near an area of plants such as poison ivy, cacti or stinging nettles, should the provisions of Decision 1-4/10 apply?

A.  No. The player must either play the ball as it lies or, if applicable, proceed under Rule 26 (Water Hazards) or Rule 28 (Ball Unplayable). Decision 1-4/10 contemplates a situation which is unrelated to conditions normally encountered on the course. Unpleasant lies are a common occurrence which players must accept.”

Ain’t golf wonderful! If you have had to seek a ruling on an unusual happening on the golf course, please post it, or email it to me and I will do the rest.

Play fast, swing slow.

Golf's Worst Foursome

An assortment of golfing items for your pleasure today:

First, a golf trivia question for you (answer below): For all golfers in the USA who have established official handicaps, is the average handicap over or under 18?

Second, congratulations to Tiger Woods (whose mother is of course Thai) and wife, Elin on the birth of their daughter, Sam Alexis Woods, born early Monday morning, June 18^th only hours after the very exciting ending of the US Open and Tiger’s missed birdie on the final hole. How considerate of mother and daughter to wait until after the end of the US Open. Apparently, it is the first time Tiger has been happy to be par (Pa, geddit!)

Third, congratulations also to Angel Cabrera who won the US Open. He joins 1967 British Open Champion Roberto De Vicenzo as the only Argentines to win a major Championship. Here is what Angel had in his bag:

Driver - Ping Rapture 7.5 degrees
3 wood - Ping TiSi Tech 14 degrees
Hybrid - Nickent 3DX DC ironwood 17 degrees
Irons (3-9) - Ping S58 w/ Rifle 7.0 shaft
Pitching Wedge - Ping S58 47 degrees
Sand Wedge - Titleist Vokey spin milled 54 degrees
Lob Wedge - Titleist Vokey prototype 60 degrees
Putter - Ping Redwood Anser 35 inch long
Ball - Titleist Pro V1x

Last, an item that I read somewhere which amused me:

What is golf’s worst foursome? Answer: Monica Lewinski, O. J. Simpson, Ted Kennedy and Bill Clinton. Why? Well, Monica is a hooker, O. J. is a slicer, Ted can’t drive over water, and Bill can’t remember which hole he played last.

Being a Brit, I have to propose my worst golf foursome as: Tony Blair (likely always to be found where there are Bushes), Gordon Brown (his score is never quite what it seems when you look more closely), John “Two Jags” Prescott (the Club secretary’s not safe, and he’s likely to biff you for saying so), and Alastair Campbell (too much spin). Oops, there goes my M.B.E.!

I’d really appreciate it if you could let me have your worst golf foursomes, with the reasons you chose them. Either post them, or email to me and I will do the rest.

Also, I will be speaking at a golf dinner later this year and if anyone out there knows a good golfing grace, e.g. “For what we are about to receive ……..”, I would love to hear it.

Play fast, swing slow!

Golf trivia question answer: The average handicap for all golfers in the US with established official handicaps is 17.3

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This Thailand Golf Blog is void where prohibited. There is no representation or warranty, express or implied, with respect to the completeness, accuracy, fitness for a particular purpose, or utility of this Thailand Golf Blog or any information or opinion contained herein. Actual mileage may vary. Prices slightly higher west of Bangkok. All models used are over 18 years of age, with the exception of those that are not. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, or events, past, present or future, is purely coincidental. This Thailand Golf Blog may not be construed as an endorsement of any product or company, nor as the adoption or promulgation of any guidelines, standards or recommendations. Some names have been changed to protect the “innocent” (Oh, yeah?). This Thailand Golf Blog is meant for educational purposes only. Some assembly may be required. Batteries (and children) not included.This Thailand Golf Blog has been posted by weight, not volume. Contents may have settled during shipment. No user-serviceable parts inside. Use only as directed. Do not eat. Not a toy.

Postage will be paid by addressee. If condition persists, consult your physician. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. One size fits all. Colours may, in time, fade. For office use only. Edited for television. Blog was current at time of preparation. At participating locations only. Keep away from fire or flame. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitised for your protection. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of the dog. Limited time offer. No purchase necessary. Not recommended for persons under the age of 12, aged between 13 and 18, and for the over 18's. Prerecorded for this time zone but suitable for all. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this Thailand Golf Blog appear for identification purposes only. Freshest if read before date on carton. Please allow 4 to 6 weeks for delivery. The author is not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. Slippery when wet. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. For recreational use only. No Thai coins. List each cheque or check separately by bank number. This Thailand Golf Blog is not an offer to sell securities.

Read this Thailand Golf Blog at your own risk. If in doubt, ask your doctor or pharmacist. Parental guidance advised. Always read the label. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment, or during sex. Do not stamp. Breaking the seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. This Thailand Golf Blog may contain non-milk fat. Date as postmark. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Read only in well-ventilated area. Price does not include taxes. Not for resale. Hand wash only. Keep away from sunlight. For a limited time only. No preservatives or additives. Keep away from pets and small children. Safety goggles may be required when reading. If rash, irritation, redness, or swelling develops, discontinue reading. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate this Thailand Golf Blog. Please remain seated until the web page has come to a complete stop. Refrigerate after opening. Flammable. Must be 18 years or older. Seat backs and tray tables must be in the upright position. Repeat as necessary. Do not look directly into light. Avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place. No salt, MSG, artificial colouring or flavouring added to this Thailand Golf Blog. Pregnant women, the elderly, fanatical golfers, and children should avoid prolonged exposure to this Thailand Golf Blog. If ingested, do not induce vomiting. May contain, be prepared by, and read by, nuts. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Do not read if safety seal is broken. Please put the toilet seat back down and wash your hands after reading.

Apply only to affected area. Take care reading this Thailand Golf Blog if you have high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, thyroid disease, asthma, glaucoma, sexual difficulties, or pain during urination. May be too intense for some readers. In case of accidental ingestion, seek professional assistance or contact a poison control centre immediately. Many suitcases look alike. Post office will not deliver without postage. Not the Beatles. Thailand Golf Blogs are not authorized for use as critical components in life support devices or systems. Author does not carry cash. Do not puncture or incinerate. Do not play your headset at high volume. Discontinue use of this Thailand Golf Blog if any of the following occurs: itching, aching, vertigo, dizziness, ringing in your ears, vomiting, giddiness, aural or visual hallucinations, tingling in extremities, loss of balance or coordination, slurred speech, temporary blindness, drowsiness, insomnia, piles, difficulties having sex, profuse sweating, shivering, or heart palpitations. However, do not resist sending cash donations to the author. Video+ and Video- are at ECL voltage levels, HSYNC and VSYNC are at TTL voltage levels. It is a violation of international law to use this Thailand Golf Blog in a manner inconsistent with its labelling. Intentional misuse by deliberately concentrating and inhaling the contents can be harmful or fatal. This Thailand Golf Blog has not been shown to cause cancer in laboratory rats. Do not use the AC adaptor provided with the player for other blogs.

DO NOT DELETE THIS LINE! -- the integrity of this Thailand Golf Blog depends on it.

Warranty does not cover normal wear and tear, misuse, accident, lightning, flood, hail storm, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, avalanche, earthquake or tremor, hurricane, solar activity, meteorite strike, nearby supernova and other Acts of God, neglect, damage from improper or unauthorised use, high golf scores (whatsoever the cause), divorce or marriage break-up, incorrect line voltage, unauthorised use, unauthorised repair, improper installation, typographical errors, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, microwave ovens or mobile phones, sonic boom vibrations, ionising radiation, reader adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the blog, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, disk failure, accidental file deletions, mud slides, forest fire, riots or other civil unrest, acts of terrorism or war, whether declared or not, explosive devices or projectiles (which can include, but may not be limited to, arrows, crossbow bolts, air gun pellets, bullets, shot, cannon balls, BBs, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, ICBMs, or emissions of electromagnetic radiation such as radio waves, microwaves, infra-red radiation, visible light, UV, X-rays, alpha, beta and gamma rays, neutrons, neutrinos, positrons, N-rays, knives, stones, bricks, spit-wads, spears, javelins, golf clubs, golf balls, golf caddies, golf carts, golf gloves, playing partners etc.).

Other restrictions may apply. Breach of these conditions is likely to cause unquantifiable loss that may not be capable of remedy by the payment of damages, although you should give that a try first.

This supersedes all previous disclaimers